I have never had an inclination to hunt or shoot any living creature. Until now… I don’t want to injure this animal, I just want to scare the hair off him so he relocates to someone else’s porch.

Resident Critter: Mr. Squirrel and his partner. He is deemed male for many reasons but i do not actually know the sex. Everyday he stalks me, waiting for me to slip and leave the doors open unguarded. Once he bit a hole through the screen, had a party in the dog food bag, and then pooped all over my kitchen floor.

I know that this is my fault because of my delicious loquat tree that they eat every ripe piece of fruit off littering the deck with skins, seeds and other defined gross matters. And perhaps my compost bin full of goodies entices their plump round bellies, keeping them coming back for more. So I will refrain from gun powder and perhaps settle with a super-soaker water gun.

This was a very hard plastic tupperware that Barry unknowingly left outside. Whoops! On a side note* this past day the dogs were barking like crazy…I thought they were yelling at the squirrel. Turns out there was a raccoon fishing in my pond. Good for him-bad for the fish. I yelled, stamped my feet, threw the grill scrubber, hollered some more. This Mr. Raccoon was completely UNFAZED…the dogs were still barking their heads off… He finished his lunch, and then meandered..yes, meandered around my yard and the alley in what appeared to be a drunken stupor. I called and reported this tipsy coon to animal control but I think he got away. I am only mentioning this because of what happened a couple months ago…so guard your beer and your fish..oh and keep an eye on your kiddos too. peace

http://www.naplesnews.com/news/2010/feb/11/raccoon-attacks-florida-officials-warn-residents-a/